After reading the title of this article, you probably think I am going to describe the usual and begin by compiling a to-do list in order of importance and then expect you to show this article to your fiancé, who will react by saying something like “It’s one day! Is it really that much work? Maybe we should just elope.” Then your mother or mother-in-law-to-be (or both) might say something like “Well, that list is important. It’s only one day! It has to be perfect.” Honestly, I laugh when I read articles that try to advise readers on subjective matters by listing steps in order. It’s only ONE DAY, and it’s your day. There are no steps in order of importance. It’s supposed to be fun; not stressful. It’s supposed to be about you. I know everyone says that, but if you think about it, they’re also the same people who show you the articles with the lists.
I believe that the planning part of the wedding is not only important but is the most important part of the wedding. But it’s not because you might mess something up by forgetting something; or ending up with the same colors as your mother’s neighbor’s daughter had at her wedding; or by seating Aunt Alice next to Aunt Martha, her archrival. Your fiancé and moms are correct in saying that it’s only one day, which actually means planning your wedding is all there is. So enjoy it; stretch it out as long as you possibly can with a long engagement; get friends, family, and your number one man involved as a way of spending quality time together. Spend a Sunday afternoon discussing food and cake with Mom; get your best friends together for wine on a Thursday night and look at dresses online; have dinner with your fiancé and discuss your music choices. And you, yourself, the new bride-to-be aka Queen for a Day, can privately imagine the day you’ve been dreaming about since you were seven years old as it becomes a reality!!! Yes, this is the time when you can sit back and bask in the idea of your engagement and the events to come.
Why does everyone always forget the point of it all? Leave the stress for the marriage, the jobs, and the bills. And since I’m being completely honest here, I might as well just admit on behalf of EVERYONE that the wedding really doesn’t have much to do with the marriage. The color of your bridesmaids’ dresses in no way reflects the love you and your husband-to-be have for each other. The song for your first dance might, but the fact that the chicken is dry has no bearing on the future of your relationship. The relationship is not doomed if something goes wrong at the wedding or reception. There, I said it. You all thought it though.
You want the real to-do list (in order)? Here it is…
- Decide what will make you happy. And what will make him happy (if he’s into it). Some guys care and some don’t. It doesn’t matter either way.)
- Spend time with this vision and savor it. It’s all about fun. Big wedding receptions are not the law.
- Choose the most important part for you: The dress? The music? The food? What’s your favorite part? Mine was the music so I got all the songs and listened to them over and over in the car imagining my husband and best friends dancing to the songs I dedicated to each. If you like to watch cooking channels, maybe you think the food is the best part.
- Once you’ve chosen your favorite part, spend time on that. Like I said, go slowly with everything. Literally stop to smell the roses. Then actually choose which flowers you want if you want flowers at all.
- Check to see if you are still making yourself happy. If so, proceed…
- After an appropriate amount of time has passed and you’ve savored every moment, start making decisions and book. According to most sources, the average couple is engaged for fourteen months, which is appropriate. You might want to take a little longer. After spending time envisioning and enjoying the idea of the wedding for at least six or seven months, book the big stuff at least eight months in advance. This way, after you book the venue and the vendors, you will still have plenty of time to plan the details and continue to enjoy the experience. It’s also important to realize that venues and vendors book up quickly. You can’t wait until two or three months before your wedding and expect everyone to be waiting around for you to book. If you really liked a DJ and a restaurant, the chances of them being available at the same time will be less likely the longer you wait. And if you wait too long (like some of you have been doing), you may end up with nothing!
- After you’ve booked the venue/caterer; DJ or band; photographer/photo booth (aka the Main Puzzle Pieces), you can continue to work on the details such as your dress and attire and flowers along with color schemes and décor and music selections (which these Main Puzzle Piece companies will help you with). This means you can wait a little longer to complete your vision because the main areas are taken care of. You can wait longer for the dress because the dress will always be there. You can wait on the flowers because the florists can do multiple events per day unlike DJs and Photographers and caterers who only have a certain amount of people working for them, and venues, who only have a few rooms available each day. Waiting to finalize food and music can wait too because you will need the help of the venue and the DJ. Catch my drift?
Now for the boring logistics: how will everything come together? This is the part that doesn’t fit with the rest of my advice to relax and enjoy. Nevertheless, every great artist must have a bookkeeper when she sells her famous paintings (i.e. You have no choice but to do some actual planning and logistical preparations.) But remember, if things don’t go perfectly or the way that the moms want it, it’s not the end of the world. The wedding is for fun anyway. Get it? You have to make sure that everything and everyone will arrive at the correct place at the correct time so that your vision becomes reality and all the parts become a whole.
Music in Motion and Creative Events is designed to make the logistics easier for you. We are here to help you plan your special day stress-free and on a budget. If you think you can’t have a fabulous wedding unless you pay $80K, then there’s probably nothing else this Blog can offer you. However, if you like the idea of doing your wedding in under $10K with the help of a family who does it all the time, I suggest you join our Mailing List and follow our Facebook Page for more tips on how to be a bride with less stress and more money in your pocket. If you don’t hire us for anything, we won’t hold it against you either, but at least you will have heard opinions and ideas from our company and other brides. In future Blogs and posts, we will be providing you with tips on how to do things more efficiently and cost-effectively; showing ideas on décor, food, and even beverages for your bar; discussing controversies and challenges surrounding you, the bride-to-be, and your wedding; and providing emotional support through the posts and contributions of our company representatives and other brides-to-be and former brides. Whatever your needs, Music in Motion and Creative Events is here to help share ways for brides of all ages and cultures to plan their hassle-free weddings for way less than the average cost of a today’s wedding. You can always bounce ideas and questions off of us on Facebook Page. So don’t stress. Sit back, relax and enjoy. OMG! You’re getting married!!